Amazing Day

Amazing first because this is my second post in two days :P

But also because I got to play with my girl. I just can't even explain how full my heart is right now.

It started with me going out to take care of chores this morning because Ellie got back from a week long cruise at 1:00am and I didn't want her to have to wake up and do chores. I'm sad to admit that this last week while I've been taking care of chores is the first time in too long that I've actually seen Sora every day. Mainly it's because it's been winter and it gets dark too quickly but it's still been hard on me. At any rate, I finished up chores and went home but returned later once it had warmed up.

During the week I've been taking Sora on nice long walks where she basically gets to decide where we go. She has been choosing to walk out along the road but I've normally cut it fairly short so we don't get too far from her friend. Today though I let her go further and she was just so calm and happy it was hard to believe this is the same horse I started with. It was one of those moments in time that you find yourself looking back to the beginning and wondering how you were lucky enough to end up here.

I did finally decide it was time to turn around and head back but when we got back to the tack shed Sora was NOT interested in being done. I would have loved to do more with her but my legs were so tired from tramping through snow at horse speed that I threw precaution in the air and climbed up onto a nearby "mounting block" just to see what would happen. Only partially to my surprise Sora marched up to it and parked herself like she was wondering why I hadn't thought of it sooner :>)

I climbed on ready to jump off at the first sign of discomfort but she just turned and walked us back towards the road. I sort of drew the line at riding a horse with just a leadrope, not even fastened at both ends, bareback and without a helmet (yes I'm sorry) along even a quiet road so I draped the leadrope back around her neck like a cordeo and using my seat, legs and cordeo cues asked her for a nice turn and she gave it. The best part though was that while she would stop for treats when she had done something nice, she also had forward movement the entire time. We never got stuck and even when I decided I should climb off she didn't want me to and tried to keep going. It's awesome when your horse has connected standing perfectly still to mounting and dismounting so strongly that they think you won't be able to figure out how to dismount if they just keep walking lol!

I was just so happy to get to spend the wonderful, warm, sunny day with my horse in such complete harmony. I just don't know what I would be found if I hadn't found AND and so completely changed my riding and training style.

I should mention, so that no one thinks I'm an abusive horse owner, that much of Sora's discomfort seems to stiffness and that after our trail walk, for example, she was walking like normal even when bending or backing. It was because of this and the fact that at even a hint of a limp I would have been off that I risked our short 10 minute ride. So no worries, Sora and her health mean WAY more to me than one short, wonderful ride :)

Double Move

So much has changed since my last post that it is hard to know where to begin!

First, I ended up moving Sora and I think it was one of the best things I ever did. My friend who owns a single mare named Sky had offered a few months ago to let me keep Sora there for free, or almost free, but I turned her down because at the time I was really content at RnR and felt that I couldn't deal without the arenas, plus since my rent was tied to my board I didn't want to upset anything and end up without a place to live. However, after I returned from seminars I found out that I was going to have to be out of the place I was renting by March.

I was both happy and sad because it freed me up to move Sora but it also meant that I would probably end up paying about twice what I had been paying for rent which would have dramatically strained my already tight budget.

To make a long story short I moved Sora and while borrowing the trailer from a neighbor woman named Lisa I found out that she was looking for a roommate! The rent would be cheaper, Riley would have other dogs to play with and I would be 2 minutes from Sora instead of 15. I moved on January 1st and I am really liking it there. There has been some adjustment to living with someone else again but mainly it has been good and between paying less for board and paying less for rent I have a little extra which is, of course :), getting spent on Sora and it means I can save up for my saddle faster!

That's the good news, the bad news is that Sora hurt herself.

I got the call from Ellie, the woman I'm boarding Sora with, that Sora had fallen and wasn't happy about walking. Ellie is fairly green with horses so I was picturing a small limp but when I showed up after work, at 10:00pm, she was standing in the shed without ANY weight on her leg. Ellie was panicking but I've dealt with so many injuries in the past that I just checked Sora all over and with the absence of any swelling or sensitive spots I opted to give her a small amount of bute, put hay within easy reach and see what she was like in the morning.

Luckily in the morning she was walking on it and after calling a friend and knowing where to poke and prod we discovered that she probably tore a ligament in her stifle. Luckily as well it is probably the best, bad injury she could have and she is now walking almost completely normally on a straight line but gimping fairly badly on curves or when backing. Stifle recoveries can take as long as 6 months so we have a long road ahead of us.


The thing that has amazed me the most in all of this is how utterly miserable I was at RnR without even knowing it! The people there were nice but in a, rude behind your back because you obviously have NO idea what you are doing, sort of way :-/ They would tell me Sora was nice, or that I should come riding with them but try to give me advice about how I should have started riding her at two and since I hadn't I had ruined her and should try to sell her.

I should have seen how miserable Sora was as well but it was truly brought home when she basically pulled me into the trailer, and this is only the second time I've ever trailered her, even with the scary tractor cleaning out the pen next to us.

The scary tractor by the way waited until I decided to load her to move to the pen that was right next to us.

Encouragement!

I am currently blogging from the very ritzy St. Croix Falls McDonalds because I do not have air conditioning and I was feeling in danger of melting :)

Because of the heat, all I have done with Sora for the past four-five days is bathe her, scratch her (a lot), and share food with her like oranges, apples and granola bars. I feel like she has greatly deserved it!

On Thursday I went out to see her thinking I would do ONLY what she wanted. I brought a bag of carrots and an Orange and brought her in the arena to play and hang out. For awhile I scratched all her itchy places and encouraged her to roll and get nice and dirty and then I left to get her grooming stuff. Sora is far less confident when I leave her so she started running back and forth which quickly turned into a very energetic game. Two years ago she wouldn't have been able to calm herself down and I would have been too scared to go back in the pen with her but when I got back with the grooming tools I went right in and started brushing her. At this point I had an audience of several people and one of them is someone I have been spending more time with who we will call J.

Once again I am reminded not to judge a book by it's cover because she is not someone who I would seek out to ride or spend time with but she has turned out to be incredibly supportive and open minded, and fun! She wanted to ride her young horse and said she would feel better if someone was around so since the other group was leaving I said I would hang around with Sora thinking that I would just play with her on the ground a bit. J started to roundpen her gelding and he started to race around and Sora charged him from outside the fence!!! I think that my normally submissive little horse was getting something from him she didn't like. I smooched to her a little to drive her away and then kept her further from him with my body language.

Eventually J brought her horse into the arena to ride and after some more groudwork mounted. Up until this point I had no plans to ride but everything with Sora was going so well that I led her over to the mounting block by the lunge line, tied it up at the end and stepped up on the mounting block. I left it up to her whether I would mount or not and it took her a couple of tense minutes to relax and finally she sighed and stepped up so perfectly lined up that I knew she was willing and hopped on :D I was holding the lunge line attached to her halter but didn't have anyway to steer her other than my seat. Of course she was incredible!!! I was talking to J about the type of training I do and although she probably thought I was crazy to climb on like that, she quickly saw that Sora was happy and relaxed and started drilling me with questions :) It was wonderful and she was so encouraging.

What is funny is that the thing that made me the proudest is that I listened to Sora and when she stopped in the corner and pawed when I asked her to turn I climbed off!!! Funny when you are pleased with yourself for doing something that most people would warn you away from lol.

Looking Back, Looking Forward

Sometimes it seems as if Sora and I have made no progress or even have gone backwards. For me this blog is more to remind myself of where we were and the progress that has been made than anything else.

For the last few months I have been in continuous flux about how to train Sora, trying to figure out the "right" way. This has unfortunately been not because I have/had doubts but because others have had doubts in me. Honestly I am a big chicken and my safety has always been my highest priority. Riding is the only risk I take and although it is a big one I have ALWAYS taken every precaution available to reduce that risk including not riding anything scary. This means that when I had two "knowledgeable" horse people at the barn telling me that I was going to get hurt I listened.

At least for a short time :)

The conclusion I came to is that they can't even begin to imagine the type of relationship I have with Sora. Relationship maybe isn't even the word to use. The words I think of are trust, confidence, time, experience, feel, belief, caution, respect, sensitivity, years, training, familiarity, and I just can't think of a word that encompasses them all. They are all trail riders (slow with a drink in one hand type trail riders), they train their horses not to spook and to carry them slowly down trails. While I respect their ability to do this I have absolutely no interest in that type of horse sport and neither does Sora.

They seem to see her running wildly around her pasture and not see her standing still under me without tack after I mount because I am shaking (Thanks to the fact two of them are watching me just about ready to dial 911) or taking a couple of steps at a time while waiting for me to calm down. Walking with her head on the ground to calm me. Licking me like a foal when I've had a bad day and come to her crying. Allowing, no Asking me to mount and go for a ride. Galloping to me to do things because they are fun and she likes me and believes in me.

Now I'm not saying every horse/human relationship should be like this. In fact for many it would be dangerous and not recommended. However for me Sora has been more therapy than anything else could be. She has changed the very way I look at the world and they way I react to everything. I live in the moment now more than I ever did before, I am calmer and far more positive and the controlling and unhealthy part of me is just about gone. I can now climb on a horse without a huge rush of adrenaline which is unheard of for me and if that can only happen on a young, hot, tackless Arabian than I am proud of both of us!

Today I took the time to read back through my posts to the point where I started AND. I am amazed at the progress that has been made. Much of it hasn't even been noted on here but when I read about something that I was having trouble with in these posts and compare it to where we are now it makes me happy. Seeing the progress in both of us makes me even more certain that I am on the right path for me and the right path for Sora.

I hope to track more of our progress, and current issues, as soon as I get back home from this weekend but for now,

Happy 4-TH of July Weekend!!!

Another Gorgeous Day

and still no pictures :/ I am hoping to get some video this weekend but it will depend on if my dad is willing.

I went for a ride on Jackson again today and was pleased to find that he was more willing to have the saddle on his back. He must like the treeless which doesn't surprise me because he has always been difficult to fit. He walked me around the pen for a little while and then I climbed off out in the pasture and switched the saddle onto Sora's back. She was even calmer this time as though expecting it and was pleased to have my attention back on her, the princess :)

This time when we got back to the drylot I used my favorite tree stump mounting block and asked her to step up to it. Several times while I played with her saddle and stirrups the other horses would come up too close trying for grain and I would swing the rope at them while Sora stood stock still next to me. She made me extremely proud and I even managed to work through her snatchiness with treats that's made worse when she is around the mounting block, probably me and my nerve's fault. I am proud to say that this is her third (yes third) year of mounting practice and she is standing stock still and willing. I am really glad that I didn't do more riding when she was three or four because I can see the increase in her confidence and physical maturity. I really think this will be our year for heading out on trail rides and spending more time training.

I was also impressed and relieved to see that thanks to a new, small, increase in wither (thanks to her increase in maturity over the winter) the treeless saddle stayed upright easily and I would now feel confident climbing on her with it.

Oh, and look at this cute little barn! I so want something like this when I finally get my own property.


Finally a couple of pictures of where Sora will be in a month or so :D I would love to hear any suggestions for a new boarder. I'm a little nervous about the move and not having Sora right outside my door :/

The Mythical "Go" Button

Today I decided was the time to work on encouraging Sora to go forward. This was something that she was overwhelmingly good at. When I first got her the barest move on my part would send her racing to the other side of which ever field we were in thanks to her previous abuse and lack of human contact. In other words she was extremely right brain dominant. Now she is so left brain dominant that it is almost hard to get her to move.

This summer I trimmed her hooves right in front of our garage door without any type of restraint, she wasn't even wearing a halter, while my dad revved his Ducati in the garage which made a sound like an airplane taking off. Not only did she hold still, she was actually relaxed. Regularly she stands still in front of me while I jump up and down, cluck, wave my hands around like a nut case and throw a rope at her. I actually am proud of this because it means she will be a willing and nonflighty riding partner, however she does actually need to move sometimes as well and since I am against using pressure, such as a whip, I need to think of a different way of teaching it.

Today I got started by jogging with her jogging next to me. With me moving she happily matches my speed right along next to me but won't go fast or slower. I tried getting her to outpace me by swinging a rope next to me but she was having none of it and I was worried, although she gave me no reason to be, that if I increased the pressure she would kick out at me as she passed. I therefore gave up on that method and started doing some free lunging.

In AND a horse that will lunge freely in a perfect circle around you without a single piece of tack is spoken about in hushed tones but thanks to Sora's high food motivation it was something that I could ask for fairly quickly. The problem is getting her to turn off and leave the circle which is necessary at points both for AND and for my purposes today. The pressure of flapping a rope at her and clucking wasn't working very well so I started to reward any tiny movement away from me and it started to work.

After some work, and exhaustion on my part, she actually started to run in a line away from me, getting extra grain for a canter or gallop. I would wait until she was a couple steps away and then call "check" and she would spin and gallop back to me for her treat. Eventually she was going several strides away from me and I changed up the game a little.

One thing that many people in AND are able to accomplish quickly that I've always had trouble with is mimicry. Sora will do many things to mimic me such as backing up, pawing, almost rolling :) and so on and she will trot or walk right next to me but she won't mimic me from a distance. As soon as I start to move in the same direction as her and not point my front at her she just falls into the circle and comes right to me. So today I used one of her established tricks, backing up when she is in front of me facing me, and would get her started out "lunging" and then start moving in the same direction. This is something that I have tried before but I tried it harder today and in different ways. It was quite rough but I actually got her to mimic me cantering which is what I really want. The reason for this is that if I can get her to canter mimic me at a distance and learn to mimic canter where she can move faster than I can, I can get her to mimic canter right next to me at a slower pace and therefore teach collection at that gait. Something that I am striving for.

Oh, and the picture is two year old Sora from before I bought her although right at this moment her mane doesn't look that much better :/ I truly meant to get some pictures but my camera battery was uncharged. I'm hoping to get pictures this weekend since it has been so terribly long.

Welcome 2011

I am so happy to welcome 2011! 2010 was crazy between work, lack of money, starting a new part time job and stress over the fact that after two years of grad school, constantly looking for work, while my classmates got jobs all around me, I still don't have a job.

2011 will be a year of changes for me. First I'm sure I'll find a job, hopefully sooner rather than later, which means that I'll finally get to move out of my parents house but more pertinent to this blog it will mean moving Sora and boarding a horse for the first time in my life.

I'm sure I'll miss having a horse right outside the house, feeding in the beautiful mornings with the birds singing, getting to make choices about how to care for her and getting to see her out the window. However, right now I can't wait to board. Partly because we don't have a good place to ride, no good footing, and I have no one to ride with or talk about horses. I also don't have a trailer so I'm completely stuck here. There will be so many good things about having Sora in a boarding facility and while I'm sure I'll have some complaints once she is actually there, right now I can't wait for the freedom that comes with not having to feed three times :) and mostly I just can't wait to have a nice, safe arena to ride in and people to ride with!!

In other news I just want to say how lucky so many horses in the blogs I read are to have such wonderful people. A couple of weeks ago my hoof trimmer, Erika, invited me to come with her after she trimmed our horses to help with a foundered pony (the owner's words). Once we got there we realized it wasn't founder, just a case of neglect. The ponies poor hooves looked like elf shoes and it took us almost two hours to get them looking anywhere close to normal. I was incredibly impressed with what Erika was able to accomplish and the pony looked relieved to be able to walk.

There were also two other horses on the property and as my trimmer put it they were "lucky to have weak hooves because they could self trim." The worst part was that no sooner had I left to come back home then Erika texted me that the horses had no water and were licking frozen puddles to drink. She couldn't even find any type of permanent water trough but finally found a bucket to give them water. I almost cried and it was nice to be able to come home to Sora, standing in her clean shed, in her puffy blanket with warm water only a few steps away.



Finally, the master list of goals for the year.

1. Strengthen Sora, especially her back to prepare for some light riding
2. Do more to desensitize her to the saddle
3. Perfect my hoof rasping technique and Sora's hoof holding technique
4. Reduce the amount of treats Sora gets and increase the time between treats, especially with the behaviors Sora is good at
5. Push Sora a bit more working toward behaviors that are more perfect and her to perform better than just adequate

Invisible Connection

I'm enjoying this more and more. I realized a few days ago that this is really always what I wanted when I thought about having a horse. I dreamed that it would be like it was for Alec Ramsey, riding bareback and bridle less on the beach with a horse that actually wanted to be with me rather than being forced to put up with me. Reality was sadly very different and Bucky completely shattered that dream in so many ways. Because of that I really forgot about that dream, wrote it off as an impossibility but now it's actually getting closer and closer.

Yesterday I went out to spend time with Sora. I brought two carrots but didn't really plan on doing any training. I used the carrots getting Sora more comfortable around the mounting block but then she wanted to leave me and go with her herd to graze so I let her. She ran out to them and I could tell she was interested in running around and playing so I went to play with her and we had fun =) She ran and bucked and reared. Finally she stopped so I just sat on the grass and we spent some time together. One of our horses chased her and I chased the horse and then she was stuck to me like glue.

Sora just stuck by my side and she kept wanting to just smell me. She'd press her nose up against my hand and just stay like that for several seconds. It was wonderful and when I left she wanted to come with me.

Today the weather is nuts and I don't know if I'll spend much time outside but I have tomorrow off so I'm hoping to start teaching her a new behavior. Now that we're getting better at communicating maybe it's time to start teaching her to rear, or maybe I'll chicken out and teach her how to bow =)

Finally one of my sources of inspiration

Herd, not Human

A change has happened with Sora and my relationship. Starting earlier this week I finally became a treasured member of Sora's herd rather than simply Katlyn. With that said, I am a very treasured, respected and valued herd member that never gets kicked at, bitten or run over. However that really isn't that strange as horses generally don't do these things to each other anyway except in extremely rough play or when vying for dominance.

Currently not much training is going on but there is a lot of learning happening with both of us. I'm learning how to be and remain congruent with positive and appropriate energy. Sora is learning how to read my body language and how much more delicate I can be than a horse which means that it does hurt me when she snaps and that I react with fear if feet start flying too near me. The thing is that right now all she needs as a correction is the fear. She backs off just as I do when she gets fearful and nothing more needs to be done since we respect eachother.

The more specific work that has happened has been working with the Cordeo and teaching Sora that I would like her walking next to me when we are "working" but that she can be where ever when we play.

I have come to a few powerful realizations. First, that working with/playing with a horse either at liberty, doing groundwork or on their back is not dangerous (at least no more than walking to your car) as long as there is respect from and in both parties and as long as both parties are fairly alert. Basically the things I always saw as impossible, dangerous or stupid simply aren't with the type of relationship Sora and I are working on. I wasn't thinking about the fact that riding, for example without a bridle, isn't dangerous at all if you are able to listen to what the horse is telling you. If the horse tells you something is scary or dangerous you climb off and that a horse that respects you just won't buck to remove you, only to show exuberant mood (if at that point you can't stay on that's hardly the horse's fault lol).

These are simple things but I am discovering that I tend to be fearful of everything in my life (the fact that my first few experience with horses were with horses that did want to hurt me didn't help at all). Sora is the same way and we are teaching and learning from each other. A good example of this is when I climbed on Sora for the first time ever bareback yesterday. She wasn't sure she wanted me there and I could tell she thought that feeling me move that clearly was strange but she didn't want to hurt me! She values my friendship and respects me. Even though she knows that I wouldn't hurt a hair on her if she expressed herself that way (natural fear response), she also knew that I would climb off the minute she needed me to. Because of that even though I had a rush of adrenalin and was shaky she stood stock still until I gathered myself a little and when I lost my balance (I haven't had a chance to ride all winter and am disgustingly weak in my core) she stopped and waited for me to regain my balance. All of this in a halter, on a windy day with completely loose reins.

Sora has been learning a lot from our time together as well and has never been calmer. I've realized that if I were to tell someone that something was dangerous and they ignored me it would only heighten my fear whereas if they responded to it and then ignored it I would feel completely safe. I've started to acknowledge everything Sora tells me is scary. I look, smell (breath deeply) and sometimes “shy” while remaining calm with an in control, leader sort of attitude, and most of the time after acknowledging the scary I go back to what we were doing. Between that and the increase in time I spend with her she is now calmer than any other horse I've been around. This is all because of trust. As a member of the herd she knows I'm looking out for both of us and wouldn't lead us into danger. She also sees that I respect her decisions and pay attention to the things she thinks are scary. Yesterday I went to save a rubber ball from the wind and when I tossed it over the fence into Sora's pen, the wind took it and threw it against her legs. She just stood there looking at it. She was ready to run but since I didn't and just smiled and waited she came over to me relaxed not even really looking at the ball. Very impressive (at least to me) from a still three year old Arabian filly.

School is Torture

I have been quiet recently because of school. I'm in Midterms and have a short term class final in a couple weeks. Because of that this is copied from my training journal on the AND forum.

Things have been great with us! Starting Wednesday I had three really good days with Sora. I didn't write earlier because school is nuts right now. In the span of two weeks I have two accounting quizzes and a final and a public policy final. Today I finished one of the accounting tests and after Tuesday the public policy final will be done. Because of that its been tough to work with Sora.

Wednesday I took her out to our arena/pen to play a bit. I had forgotten that we have grass growing everywhere in that pen and Sora has never been able to ignore grass even for treats. I wanted so much to push her or chase her a bit but i didn't. I just walked around, not really ignoring her but not asking her to come either. I had almost given up when she came over to me for a treat. She stood nice and calm without mugging and got one but then walked off to graze again. Once again I let her go and after only a few more minutes she came to play! She was glued to me for the rest of the time I was in with her and we had FUN. She was rearing and spinning and "cutting" me as I played keep away but was extremely polite the entire time and only forgot herself and tried mugging once or twice

Then on Friday morning we tried Karen's idea of patrolling the fence line. It was windy and cool and although Sora was calm I decided I wanted to play a little. I found a tree to beat on (made Sora confused since that's not one of the "scary trees") but the best part was when I shied. We were waaaay up in the pasture away from her herd which makes her looky anyway and then I "shied" snorting away. She raced off but came right back to me! Trotting like she was floating over the ground and I could tell she was teasing me. Not scared at all just laughing that I'd shied. She always comes back but normally she stands and looks for a long time first. This time she just came straight back.

Then tonight I needed to work on her hooves. She's barefoot and with the guidance of an incredible barefoot trimmer I've been doing it myself now for about six months. The trimmer also happens to do Reiki(sp?) and is an animal communicator so I know who to go to if I ever have trouble

I normally cross tie her, which she's good for, and she gets tons of treats. This time though I'd read about someone on here who sits on a stool with the horse's foot in their lap and I realized that would really help me as I'm not that coordinated yet with the file so I decided to try it. I put down some hay to help her be calm this first time, didn't tie her or even have a lead rope on her halter, and then I carried a stool and tools over to her. As I was setting my stool down next to her she was already lifting her foot wonderful obliging girl that she is she held it up for me as I sat down. She was really good with every foot except the hind right which she is normally nervous about. She was actually better than normal with that one too.

I love doing anything with her feet because she was impossible with them at first. I had people suggest to tie them up but I could never do that. In the end I decided to just wait for her and one day she picked them up with just a touch Now she's so good that she actually waits to set the back ones down until I step away. Her own decision, not something I ever asked of her, so that she doesn't step on me i think

I'm trying to get some pictures but I don't have anyone here who's really willing to take them and when I try all I get is nose

So as you can see things are going GREAT! I also managed to sell both my saddles so as soon as my rebate check comes I'll be able to buy a saddle that will actually fit her!!! I'm SOOOOOO excited!

Now, back to stressful studying.